Thursday, October 14, 2010

my only private space ......

can i request for one thing ? whenever i helped u or do anything for u .... pls dun say thanks .... cuz it reli hurts ...

until 2dae then i found out .... why i felt hurt whenever she say thanks .... maybe tat is bcuz wht i want is not a thanks ....

frankly speaking, im a kind of person tat wont do things tat resulted zero to me one ..
at least tat wht i think of myself ....

somehow ... when it come to her ... all things changed ... my attitude ... my behavior
example normally i owes scold rude words in my chatting .... but whenever im wif her, it seem quite impossible for me to say any rude word ....

my mood .... is decided by her every word .... every action .... every glances ....

if she say hi ~ im veri happy
if she say bye ~ my heart dropped ...

i never knew hw it felt like of missing a person ....
when i gettin to know tat i nt goin to heard any news from her for weeks ....
unable to see her face ..... heard her voice .... anything anything from her ...
my heart is shivering cuz im scared .... i also duno wht i scare bout ...

im ugly .... im fat .... im disgusting ....

but yet i guess i have the right to like someone i reli liked , right ?

my life is been like my usual life until she stepped in .... the images was like a film ..... flowing from the day i knew her existence ..... smk chung hua ...... until we happen to met each other and sit together eating pizza during form 5 ... i never reli noticed she .... until the day we met again in college .... everything was so different ... the feeling .... the way it flow ... it's amazing ....

but still the stories go on ....

phew ..... i feel relieved after ojibala here .....

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